When One Relationship Ends

When a relationship ends, it’s tempting to dwell on what you did wrong or what you could have done differently. Your dwelling on this might be from the assumption that you could somehow change things by rehashing the past but, you can’t.

It is advisable that when thoughts of the past crawl into your head, you must find ways to pull yourself into the moment and try to instead, focus on the good things in your current situation.

Here are a few tips to help you get over a past relationship:

1. Remember to forgive yourself

You might think you made the biggest mistake of your life and if only you didn’t, you wouldn’t be in pain right now. Don’t go down that road there is nothing good down there! Instead, keep reminding yourself that you are human. Also, keep in mind, if you want to be loved again, that the first step is to prepare yourself to give and receive love and that starts from forgiving yourself.

2. Don’t think about any time as lost

If you’ve been clinging to the past for a while and now feel you’ve missed out, shift the focus to everything you have gained. Maybe you’ve built great friendships or made great progress in your career. When you focus on the positive, it’s easier to move on because you’ll feel empowered and not victimised.

3. Remember the bad as well as the good

We tend to remember everything with reverie, as if it was all sunshine and roses. If your ex broke up with you, it may be even more tempting to imagine she or he was perfect and you weren’t. In all reality, you both have strengths and weaknesses and you both made mistakes.

4. Reconnect with who you are outside a relationship

Unless you hop from relationship to relationship, odds are that you lived a fulfilling single life before you got into this one. You were strong, satisfied, and happy, at least on the whole. Remember that person now. Reconnect with people or interests that may have received less attention while you were attached. That will get you through this time.